Urban All-Round Master-Chapter 68 - You’re Really Funny

68: Chapter 68 You’re Really Funny

68 -68 You’re Really Funny

“Kid, don’t get too smug,” the middle-aged police officer said, slamming the table, some anger rising in him.

“Officer, you’re mentally ill, and it needs treatment,” Lin Zifeng said earnestly.

“What did you say?

You’re the one who’s sick.

How could I be sick when I’m perfectly healthy?” the middle-aged man exclaimed, indeed suffering from some diabetes.

“When a person is in their most comfortable period and can suddenly be stimulated, and their first reaction is to refute, it definitely indicates a mental issue.”

“Stop talking nonsense!” the middle-aged police officer’s gaze started to shift evasively.

“Hehe, officer, that’s what the medical books say; they are the original author, I’m just translating.

You can’t disbelieve science, can you?

Rejecting science, questioning science, that’s anti-democratic, you know!

You better think carefully, otherwise, once this surveillance footage gets copied and leaked, you might just end up being accused of crimes against humanity!”

Lin Zifeng stood up pompously and took a pack of cigarettes from the middle-aged officer’s pocket, starting to smoke it with ease.

The middle-aged man trembled with rage, feeling played by the other party, unable to vent his anger, and now even labeled as a “criminal against humanity”!

I’ve seen shameless people, but never someone to this degree, making even a man suffer under his sharp tongue.

Just then, the door of the interrogation room opened, and Su Ni walked in with a smile, signaling the middle-aged man to leave.

As he passed by Su Ni, the middle-aged man secretly wiped off some sweat.

“Yo, what’s got you in such a good mood, beautiful officer?

Did you come into some good luck?” Seeing Su Ni’s smiling face, Lin Zifeng felt there was something fishy.

Could it be she’s taken a liking to me?

Thinking of her fiery temper, Lin Zifeng realized he was not fortunate enough to enjoy it.

Who knows if she might just crush his balls into three pieces!

Seeing his face, Su Ni also had to suppress a bellyful of anger.

If it weren’t for messing up this case, she would’ve given him a fierce look long ago, let alone greet him with a smile.

That would be a dream.

“Name?”

“Lin Zifeng.”

“Age?”

“Twenty-five”

“Gender?”

“Hehe, officer, can you not ask these outdated and embarrassing questions?

I look like this, do you still need to ask me about my gender?”

Lin Zifeng leaned on the table, took a deep drag of his cigarette, then chuckled and blew the smoke towards her cheek.

In an instant, Su Ni’s slender and fair fingers crackled, her pale, bloodless face almost burst out in anger, but remembering her father’s advice to befriend this annoying man to crack the case of the bronze mask, she refrained.

After all, with a standoffish demeanor, who would want to deal with her?

“Whatever I ask you now, you only need to answer yes, or no!

Everything you say will be taken as court testimony, and if you dare to deceive us, you’ll bear the full legal responsibility,” Su Ni said, intentionally lowering her tone to threaten Lin Zifeng.

“Hehe, are you trying to scare me?

Do you think I’m some inexperienced kid who doesn’t know the law?

My lawyer isn’t here, so I have the right to remain silent.

Whatever it is, you can talk to my lawyer!”

Hah!

As if this lousy bodyguard could have a lawyer?

Ridiculous, a bodyguard barely making three thousand a month has a lawyer?

Is this some kind of joke?

“You have a lawyer?”

“I think he’ll be here in a moment.”

Lin Zifeng leaned back in his chair, smoking a cigarette, but his eyes occasionally stared at Su Ni’s voluptuous face, and he grinned, touching his chin with his right hand.

“Tsk tsk!” Lin Zifeng made two sounds of admiration.

“What are you looking at?”

Su Ni could already feel his burning gaze, and instantly she felt uncomfortable all over.

Being stared at by such a lowlife made anyone feel uneasy, especially someone as sleazy as him.

“Hehe, I’m just estimating,” Lin Zifeng laughed.

Estimating!

Estimating what?

Could he be estimating the size of my bust?

Does this guy not know how to write the word ‘death’?

Isn’t he afraid of dying?

Are my breasts something he can look at?

And to stare so openly?

Even if Su Ni was normally patient, she couldn’t help it this time, stood up abruptly, slammed the table, and scolded, “You hooligan, you better behave yourself!

Or else I’ll accuse you of obstructing official duties and detain you for a few more days.”

“Hehe, look here, beautiful officer, you dragged me here for no good reason, without water or cigarettes, and you’re still talking so loudly to me, be careful I might sue you for intimidation,” Lin Zifeng said nonchalantly, pursing his lips.

Instantly, Su Ni was at a loss for words.

Indeed, they had arrested the wrong person this time and had acted hastily.

They could have charged the other party with assault, but the victim announced to the media that it was a malicious act, resulting in no charges against the perpetrator and instead putting herself in a difficult position, now moving with great difficulty.

Even if the guy had countless connections with Mr.

Bronze Mask, she still had to treat him like a VIP; if it came out that they had arrested the wrong person, a real lawsuit could ruin her, and she might really end up managing traffic.

“Occupation?”

Su Ni, with a stern face, did not dwell on the ‘estimation’ issue anymore, but asked the next question with an icy expression.

“Hehe, security guard,” he said with a chuckle.

“Security guard?

Aren’t you a bodyguard?” Su Ni was suspicious, wondering if he was deliberately making trouble with her.

He was obviously a bodyguard, but he claimed to be a security guard?

“Security is my main job, bodyguard is my sideline.

Like us, without education or skills, if I don’t find multiple jobs, who would support me?

Now with the cost of living so high, even eating a plate of fried noodles costs over ten yuan.

If I don’t work, will you support me?”

Lin Zifeng spoke irritably.

“Humph!

I didn’t expect you to even think of progressing.”

“Uh…

I’m not progressing, just watching the door for the company.

Maybe one day a rich woman will fancy me, and maybe I could be kept by someone, then I won’t have to worry for the rest of my life,” Lin Zifeng said casually.

“Are you even a man?” Su Ni cursed angrily.

“Hehe, in this era, what’s the use of acting tough?

Being a man is just a title.

It’s only on the bed that one truly becomes a man.

By the way, do you know any sisters, preferably from a better-off family, who don’t need to work…”

Lin Zifeng took a drag on his cigarette and continued, “Preferably with smaller breasts, not like a cow.

Big looks good but it’s fake, just like someone, even though her clothes are nearly busting, the stuff inside must be fake, otherwise, how could it be so big, right?”

Lin Zifeng said this while puffing out smoke and grinning at Su Ni, clearly directing his words at her.

“You…

you’re deliberately insulting me, aren’t you?

How do you know I have big breasts?

Have you touched them?”

“Uh…

cough cough — just estimating, hehe.

Just estimating.”

Lin Zifeng had not expected Su Ni to respond like that, he was first taken aback, then laughed and said, “Whether yours are real or fake, only you know in your heart.

You’ve never let me touch them, who knows if you’ve stuffed something in there.”

“Motherfucker!

Mine are real, okay!?

If you dare, come and feel them,” Su Ni snapped.